Sunday, October 26, 2008

Grief


I have dream conversations with the dead.  This afternoon as I slept, it was with Joe, now dead for eight years.  It was as real as if he had been sitting across the table from me, dominoes in play.  

Sometimes the conversations go back more than thirty years to my father, drinking Seagrams Seven disguised in a carton of milk.  

The dreams are always pleasant and exciting while I sleep and then unsettling when I wake up; they wake me up.

"For man also knoweth not his time; as the fishes that are taken in an evil net, and as the birds that are caught in a snare; so are the sons of men snared in an evil time, when it falleth suddenly upon them."

Joe talking to me with an accent and grammar, now nearly extinct, that was once on both sides of Red River, with an understanding of a hard scrabble life I never had to experience.  

The grief by a mother who had lost a son as described by the preacher:  "But her hope drew a veil before her sorrow, and though her grief was great enough to swallow her up, yet her love was greater and did swallow up her grief."

And as the doctor, the cracked archangel, says, "...the long habit of living indisposith us for dying.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

A good dream is spent in the company of my wife's family, happy, scrappy, slightly loopy, around the tree on Christmas Eve. I look around and think to myself, "They're all dead, but I'm not going to bring it up and spoil all this fun we're having." Guess that's the difference between grief and sorrow; grief seems to be "they're gone FROM ME", and sorrow seems to be the realization that they're just........gone. Except in dreams.

bobd

Truth Seeker said...

I'm always lifted up by those dream visits from loved ones who have entered the nearer presence of God, although I have to admit that I'm always biting my tongue to keep from saying, "You know you're dead, don't you?"

Anonymous said...

Mr. Stapleton,

To lay your head down with a clear conscience must surely be a pleasant nights sleep. But how may of us can claim that trophy? Just when you think you have it all settled into a nice square package, humanity sets in.

Taking one side in spite of the facts, and to justify ones proclivity to party dogma is the easy way out. I wish it were as simple as drawing party lines.

Unfortunately, we pass off and justify in our minds, the popular way out of complicated problems.

I, for one, am grateful that our community has someone like yourself, that will challenge thought, and represent the people that are truly in need of representation despite of public opinion.

I guess that all leads back to the clear conscience theory.

ML